Most of my recent blog entries have not made it past the 'draft' stage: I've had a lot going on, what with this Project at BIPC (which is turning out to be another exercise in Dilbertism), and volunteering with the opera and the film festival.

A few rehearsals ago, one of the character actor/performers at the opera tapped me on the arm, "I have something to tell you -- it's not opera-related." Last night, while waiting in the wings for an entrance, he grabbed my shoulders and looked at me with alarm, "You're in the chat rooms, right? I've seen you there. I wanted to let you know that [screenname] is HIV positive."

This is what he wanted to tell me? He told me that a friend of his had been diagnosed positive and had only previously slept with this one person. "Is your friend alright? Does he have a support system in place for this?"

"Well, he's not really a good friend, he's only someone I've chatted with a few times."

WHATEVER! I bet I didn't react the way he wanted me to. I didn't lose my temper, but now I wish I had.

One sad fact, if true, is that the folks involved are about 20 years old. If I had time, I'd look for information showing an increase in HIV in youth. I have a feeling it's a time-bomb waiting to go off. Sure, it's not the death sentence it once was, but it's not something I ever want to have.

Having said that, I am well past the time -- if I ever reacted this way to begin with -- where I react with horror or hysteria learning of someone's positive status. I've had several friends and more acquaintances become ill and die from it. But death and dying, whether from AIDS, a heart attack or a car accident, is something we all face and is no more or less tragic regardless of cause.

More important, since the disease is preventable, then the only person I can be responsible for is myself. The guidelines for safe sex have changed little from the early days; I assume everyone I meet is potentially 'positive'. What others' do is their responsibility (and consequently their problem). It's sad when someone seroconverts, but (sadly, as I've learned through numerous failed relationships) I cannot control someone else's behavior. (bitter laughter.)

There is a flip side: I cannot comprehend kicking someone to the curb and shunning them upon learning of their diagnosis. Someone who is HIV+ does not cease to function as a human being.

So, what was the purpose of this guy giving me this 'information'? "I have no idea what your status is or what your sexual practices are..." the guy blustered. And something tells me this was the ruse to find out.